I could write a song
about the tip of your cigarette
glowing red in the dark
on the first evening of summer.
But when I put the pen to paper,
I forget everything,
Other than the feeling of how my heart stops when you stare at me a little longer
Than how friends are supposed to look at friends who are just friends.
I could write a sonnet
About how I can barely see your bright hazel eyes
Behind the glint of your broken glasses,
But somehow the light still makes them sparkle in a way that makes me think
I knew you as a child, back when you would squint into the sun playing in a way that’s hard and true,
The way kids do when they run so hard that the pavement makes their feet sting through their sneakers.
I could write a poem
About how your playlists make me dizzy
Like the DJ knew every song I’ve ever felt in my heart,
But when I start to type the words,
I stop short-
And wonder if the way I feel about you
Is just a fantasy of something else that will never be real,
Like when you stay at the nightclub until it closes
And the lights come on and the magic dissipates on the sticky floor,
And suddenly you’re sober.
I could write an essay
About all the times I’ve dreamt about you
And even if my teeth fall out
Or my joints freeze stiff
I was still happy to see you there
And hear the sound of your voice
And tangle my fingers in the curls of your hair.
Because seeing you in my dreams
Feels like I got to cheat the limits of time
where I’m constructed to only being with you in the space you exist in
As if the laws of physics were bendy, and not a given.
I could write you a letter
About how my heart wants to give you everything,
but also how you taught me to love myself first,
That the best way to love you
Is to be selfish and good for my own sanity,
To be the best version of what I can be
For both of us.
My friend, my lover, my muse
I’m not sure what you do
That makes me come alive
And nurture my creative soul
you have given me
A reason to write and make
My words whole.
Sankofa Virgo 
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